Basketball!

I played basketball again. It's totally beyond my plans. I only went down for dinner but I ended up at the basketball court. *whine* I know I know I should be studying for my tests...but that orange ball beckons to me. And oh, I think my ankle's much better. Though I think a sane person would let it rest for at least a few more days before engaging in such activites again. Oh well. I'm just a stubborn goat. Dumdeedum.

Norah Jones is plain wonderful. Why in the world did I leave that CD (thanks dear) at home??? And the Les Mis one too. Bah. *pout*

In brief(s)!

Heh. I like the title for this post. Though it has nothing to with anything at all. Ah well. Just a brief update on my activities lately. :) Had tutorial in the morning yesterday and after that I came back and did chores. Slept for a while. Talked for quite long (I sincerely hope you are feeling better now baby) and slept some more. Then at 5pm I played basketball! Whee~ I finally overcame some inertia to participate in healthy activities. But then I got injured. Cheh. Sprained my ankle-that-has-been-sprained-a-million-times-during-my-dancing-days. *phew* But I thought it was a minor thing and went ahead to play pool with people until late 11pm. And woke up this morning with a swollen ankle. Great. Now can anybody dispense a quick advice on how to walk in heels with elegence in that horrid ankle?

Performance

It's 2pm. And there's gonna be a performance in the Institute of Southeast Asian Studies (ISEAS) at 7pm. But of course, the rehearsal's starting early so I must tear myself away from the room before 3pm. Nyeyeyeye...

I wish there's more performances. But exams are coming soon...

Dreams

Rach, I think you are right. The god of this world brings calamities. But God is there to help us. And if He didn't what happens? You get a screwed up person like me that's disillusioned and just couldn't trust anymore.

Anyway, that aside. So far I have accomplished everything except Anatomy. Yay.

Right. Now to the main topic. Dreams. Have been having very disappointing dreams lately. And I guess they really represent what I'm hopinghopinghoping for. But the worst is, I can't do much about that hope. I can only HOPE. *sigh*

Procrastinate! That's the way, ba-bay...

Had quite a long day today. Sleeping at 2.15am this morning didn't really help since I had to wake up at 6.45am so that I could be at UCC by 8am for rehearsals. So, bleary-eyed and fuzzy-brained me went to the dressing room and sang all the songs in a blur. Think I screwed up some sections. But by 10.15am I was fully awake. All ready to perform in front of hard-lipped, serious and boring looking academicians. Sigh. Those people just can't appreaciate good music. Well, I wouldn't say we sounded heavenly, but at least give some of yourself to the more human side of you! Goodness. And there's some PRC looking professors...well, am not going to go into details. Such fun they are missing out man. I insist that cultural/art activities are not for weaklings in the brain section man...
(OK. I am not sounding very coherent. Am very tired from a 4-hour choir practice and waiting for my sweetheart to call)
Anyway, the function started late and I got back to my room just in time to remove the horrendous stage make-up and change into my usual clothes. And then rush to lecture. But since I had a lack of sleep, I happily dozed off. Only to be awakened by many many sms-es. Oh, and the lecture topic was on political economy. Which I have ZERO idea about. Shall skip that for the exam I guess.
(Blabbering again, I see)
Then there was a tutorial at 2pm. Quite, uh, effective I must say coz the food I bought on the way kept me awake. When the tutorial ended, I rushed back immediately. To try to catch 40 winks before going for choir later.
(Urgh. Horrid entry.)
Anyway, choir was good today. Though I don't understand why the Alto section keeps getting picked on today. We didn't sound that bad what...I even tried my best to sing with high placement and good support. Almost died standing for so long. Ahh...but I'm glad to be back in the room. Wheee~

So yup. A long day indeed. Tomorrow would be sleep-catching-up day, laundry day and room-cleaning day. Shall attempt to start on Anatomy tomorrow. Yay. Let's hope they don't remain as plans huh. *grin*

OK. Off I go now. To write stuff in my diary. :)

And oh, suddenly have this urge to say I LOVE YOU to all my friends. I miss you all. Especially Wee. Wanna go to your house to hang out again...

Song

Same Side of The Moon
Corrinne May

I'm looking out the window
Where we sat to watch the stars
There's a chill within the air
It makes my heart long for your touch
You may be miles away
But as I kneel to pray

I see the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon

I picture you across the ocean
In your corner of the world
I pray the wind will blow my voice
And gently whisper in your ear
Your night may be my day
And though the seasons change

It's still the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon
***
I wonder how it sounds like. Nice lyrics though. It's for you, baby.

Happy?

Just came back from walk. And supper. Am I satisfied? Perhaps. At least I feel too tired to even think right now. So sleep...thy solace shall I seek.

WALK

It's 11.28pm on my clock. And I want to have a walk BADLY, on my own. I want to think things over. But I'm afraid of the dangers that are lurking behind bushes. And I'm afraid I might not be alert enough for tomorrow morning's performance. And I have 1 more question to go for tomorrow's tutorial. I need a BREAK.

Can you feel the love tonight?

There's a calm surrender to the rush of day
When the heat of the rolling world can be turned away
An enchanted moment, and it sees me through
It's enough for this restless warrior just to be with you

And can you feel the love tonight
It is where we are
It's enough for this wide-eyed wanderer
That we got this far
And can you feel the love tonight
How it's laid to rest
It's enough to make kings and vagabonds
Believe the very best

There's a time for everyone if they only learn
That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn
There's a rhyme and reason to the wild outdoors
When the heart of this star-crossed voyager beats in time with yours

I love this song a lot. Do you?

*grin*

Have not had such a fulfilling day for so long. I actually did work in the morning! Thanks to you for suggesting that we should give more attention to our work. Not only do I feel much better, I feel that I have accomplished something! And it's satisfying to give myself fully to whatever I've done today. So now I'm happy.

Met Rachel today for tea cum shopping trip. I've never had such a fulfilling conversation for a long time! I really enjoyed talking to you Rach. Thanks for the wonderful time we had today. And that kinda made me miss my friends back home! How we would just sit around glasses of teh tarik to either gossip or share our heart. Lovely times.

And I'm very happy that I managed to find the Technica X pencil for you! The pencils literally appear in front of me. It was like, I was standing near a whole bunch of pens/pencils/markers/highlighters and was planning to go through every single type of writing material. BUT, it was amazing that my eyes moved to this particular section and immediately realised that I found them! Lovely.

Lovely day indeed. *BIGFATSMILE*

I want it!!

*GASP* A new iBook G4 with Panther. I want it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It looks soooooo pretty and the best thing of all, sooooo functional. *droooool*

Go check it out. HERE

BAH

Well, as I've mentioned some time ago on my blog that the person that love you most is the furthest away from you. And I could never agree more to this. Thank you YM, for making my day with your emails. Thanks for keeping in touch with me. And Wee, your quirky comments show that you are in every way still interested in my oh-so-exciting life in NUS. Rach, I'm trying to beat this procrastination of meeting up with you. Every time it seemed like I wannawannawanna meet you, some things would have cropped up. Like a test. Speaking about tests, I have one tomorrow and I have an ominous feeling that I might not be able to get much sleep tonight. And I'm glad that tomorrow's presentation is all done and prepared. Crossing my fingers and toes and legs and eyes and ears (?!!) and hoping that the girl won't bug me tonight.

Ah well. That's about all. I feel like taking pictures all of a sudden. Hmmm.

Interesting

I find that most Malaysians blogs are a better read. They are really insightful compared to the endless complaints Singaporeans blog about. And I'm in danger of turning into one lousy, complaining brat right here. So...I summon all my Malaysian-ness back to me...ohhhmmmmmmm...

Monday nights are wonderful coz I'll be back from choir pretty late and I would take a nice warm shower. Meanwhile, my Mac would be happily singing beautiful choral songs for me while I change into my night clothes. And I smile while thinking of the beautiful sounds only humans can make. Then I would turn towards my desk, looking at the pile of mess I've made through the weekend in an attempt to study. Oh well. Thinks to myself, "Will clear that another day. Think I'll just go sleep." And I plop unto my nice bed with wonderful blue bedspread. Life is good. I never felt so released and relaxed with God in my life.

Latin

"Nunc scio quit sit amor"
What does it mean?

Teddy bear!


This is Cornell Bear aka Lippy. Hee~
Soooooo adorable, right? And it smells of him too. :)

Eyes?

Does Heaven has eyes? Is that why it rains and pours so much? What is Heaven crying for? Not for my unrepentant soul I hope. I'm beyond hope.

God is dead. --Nietzsche

Stupid me

Well, posting the previous entry isn't exactly a very smart move. Suddenly I have hordes (is this right?) of bats appearing on my MSN screen. Sheesh.

And I still don't like Pharmacy people. Think it'll probably not get better. But I have to live with it? Why do I have to go through shit? First to go through this shitty education system in this shitty uni and then through a shitty course with shitty people.

What a load of crap.

Hysterical

Found out something that made me go hysterical today. Thanks to Johnson aka Robin (thank you, boy). To know exactly what is it that scares me, go to MSN Messenger and type :[ . Yup. Just enough to make me go crazy for a while. It's looks horrid leh.

Losing weight?

3 people told me that I've lost weight in just a span of 5 days! Have I really shrunk? I still wear size 25...though it used to be 27 a year ago. Oh well.

So happy. He's back from NYC. I wanna go New York too!!

Uptight

Suddenly I get so bothered. Suddenly I realised I don't like the people in Pharmacy. They are hypocrites. Well, there were plenty of those shit-I-didn't-study-at-all-for-the-test-but-of-course-you-can't-see-how-hard-I-worked-at-home people in RJ. And yes, there's some more in Pharmacy! I don't see why I should be bothered by it now. I should be used to it right? Particularly bothered by this person sharing the same bench as me. Grrr.

THANK YOU!

Thank you thank you thank you...
1. Rachel, for featuring me in your private blog. I didn't know my silly stories would perk you up so much. Am glad to be a blessing to you. :) It's been quite a while since I last saw you eh? Fatter? Hee.

2. Wee Lee, Ultraman!!!! I received your postcard today! Why in the world did you send me UPenn's postcard? A bit not right, right? Anyhow, thanks a lot...And won't I get to see you in June 2004 at home?

3. Nadia, for your faithful viewing of my blog and listening to my rants. Heh. Have fun in Taylor's.

4. And many other faithful readers...

Update

Have not been blogging for a while because I was busy with a damned project. I'm not even going to recount the moments. They're just too tiring. And frustrating. But still, I want to complain. Groupmate isn't a very nice person!! Or am I being stupid again and let people take advantage of me? There's about 8 sections to the project and I had to write 5 sections!! And all the while my tests were haunting me, is still haunting and will be haunting me until the end of October. And she, happily finished all her tests and yet still bugged me so much with "should I write this in my sections?", "I can't seem to find the info about this, could you help me?" and "I don't know what to write for this section". Bloody hell. Come on! You are a Year 2 and probably know what is it like to do a project! SIGH. And in the end, I just had to swallow all these rubbish (again) and do all I can. Thought it's gonna end pretty well coz I assume she would be nice enough to offer to compile everything and edit them. SIGH. But no, stupid me did everything again. Anyway, with 2 very late nights and lecture-skipping, I, I repeat, I finished everything and handed the thing up 23 hours before the deadline. Now, don't ask me why 23 hours. I'll just shoot you. BUT. Am relieved that it's over. And I can concentrate on my tests now. Hopefully I'll do well for the next test which covers 7/8 of the module! Bah.

Oh. And uh, just a note of thanks to you. It's been wonderful. :) And I'm a bit paiseh to post all the mushy stuff here.

Right now I'm craving for the toast-and-half-boiled-eggs set I had last night (or this morning?) at 12. It's the first time I went for supper in Singapore! Heh. But I miss mamak-ing. The yummy maggi goreng, thick teh tarik, warm and fluffy roti telur and nasi lemak!! Yum. Hungry again. But no more supper or I'll end up skipping my morning lecture again. *grin* Plus it's not good for my already weak tummy.

LAZY...

Gave tuition to Boy again. I hope he does well in his streaming exams so that I won't get fired after a month of tuition-ing. Anyway, it was great that his mom said they might go back to Jakarta in Nov. That would mean I get to have a break to study for my finals! Yay. And I want to do well. I really really do.

Supposed to do some research for project right now. But I'm missing him so much! And I really wonder why. It's so sudden and the funny thing is, there's almost nothing to trigger that "missing". So I spent almost 2 hours poring through our photo album and my diary. I really missed the 7-month break in KL. I really miss riding in his car and getting him to pick/send me home after each meeting. (Shucks. This is making me tear) Argh. I better stop. I can't do any work with this "missing" going on. ARGH. Stop stop.

But something special's coming up very soon. :) I think you know what I mean.

SONG!

Heaven Knows
Rick Price (edited)

You're always on my mind
From the time I wake up 'til I close my eyes
You're everywhere I go
You're all I know
And though you're so far away
It just keeps gettin' stronger everyday
And even now you're gone
I'm still holding on
So tell me where do I start
'Cause it's breaking my heart
Don't wanna let you go

Maybe my love will come back some day
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows

My friends keep tellin' me
That if I really love you
I've gotta set you free
And if you return in kind
I'll know you're mine
So tell me where do I start
'Cause it's breakin' my heart
Don't wanna let you go

Maybe my love will come back some day
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows

Why I live in despair
'Cause wide awake or dreaming
I know you're never there
And all this time I act so brave
I'm shaking inside
Why does it hurt me so

Maybe my love will come back some day
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows
Heaven knows
Heaven knows

THANK YOU!

I've just posted an unhappy blog and I got some responses! Thank you guys for being so concerned for me even though we are many many miles apart. Sometimes the people that love you the most are the ones furthest from you. Thanks again. I feel so loved. *beams*

And just to let you guys know, I'm actually OK now. :) Not really depressed or anything.

YM: I know the email is long overdue. Have been trying to get myself to reply your mail but I seem to be somewhat busy recently. Even though you're out of sight, you're definitely not out of my mind. So please wait for my email yah. And I hope that things are going extremely well for you! Still need some time to digest your description of Duke's fencing room. Sounds impressive. And it's not easy to imagine how it looks like. Heh. I bet Mark Moo is drooling over his blades right then.

Wee: I know I don't sound coherent. And I do notice that my blog needs to be read a few times to be understood. Please bear with my weird English. It's just a phase. Heh.

Well, just to clear things up a bit. The bad news is um, bad news still. But the personal struggle, it has to do with me and God. Recently I've been doing things in spite of Him because I seem to think that He purposefully put obstructions in my way just to frustrate me. And I wasn't happy coz He's supposed to love me! Anyway, to cut the long story short, I've been thinking about a lot of things and their value and I even tried running away from Him -- not reading the Bible, not praying and just not succumb to the spontaneous "Oh Lord, help me!" when bad things happen. But it was bad. I just cannot run away from Him. The more I try to run, the more I feel the emptiness. And just like a love relationship, He never lets me go. In fact, He tried to woo me back by placing suprises in my way. Yet, I still try to think that it's just my luck. But all these has ended. He has found my heart again. I've been won.

Do I sound sappy or what. Heh. But it's Him, our Bridegroom. I'm smitten. Haha.

Unhappy

Not in the best of moods today. Heard of a bad news (still tentative though), forgot my wallet and one uh, very personal struggle.

Bad news. It's still tentative and I'm not sure whether I should be optimistic or pessimistic about it. But it's difficult to tell. It's something I've been looking forward so much that it just breaks my heart the moment I knew about it. So, should I remain optimistic?

Wallet. Left PGP pretty early for tuition and took the shuttle bus all the way to external bus stop. On the way, I realised I forgot my wallet and hence had to walk all the way to room and retrieve it. And since my matriculation card is inside my wallet, that means I have wait for a kind soul to descend from their level such that I can go up to my own level. (Taking lifts in PGP requires the said card to activate it) And wow. Was I late. Took a cab and arrived right on time. But the kid was late. Bah. And wasted 5.50 dollars. That could serve for a day's lunch and dinner.

Personal struggle. Well. Too many readers on my blog now. And a very self-conscious me have been exercising a large amount of censorship. Lopping off large portions of what I deemed would affect my "image" and certain too-private stuff. I'm just not as open as I seem to be. And yes, I do have a personal diary.

Highlight of the day: I bought a study lamp. FINALLY. And it costs $29.90. Is it too pricey?