The first half of today sucks. Urgh. I'll go back to sleep. Why-oh-why did I stay up until 4am? Waiting for a phonecall? Coz I had too much tea? Or is it because I had too much napping in the day?

^&#@%$. Am in a horrendously stinky mood now. Not like anybody needs to know. But still. Blog is a good place to let my mood oscillate.

Why didn't she reply? Have I become just another person that passes by? I really don't understand how she can wipe me off her memory when we spent so much time together? And that is not only the quantity that matters, but the quality too. I was afraid of this day and it has happened. I am afraid it will happen again in future. With different people the next time.

I HATE SEPARATIONS.

Today is a day of suprises.
1. Received a Dictionary of Medicines from my cousin.
2. Boss of this particular restaurant came up to me to wish me Happy Birthday despite nobody telling him about it beforehand. (Biggest suprise!)
3. Received a phonecall from previous employer. Haha.

Had the most wonderful weekend starting from Friday. Heehee. And I think I downed the most alcohol in a day on Friday. But suprisingly, it made me very sleepy. Hah. Now people don't really need to spike my drinks to make me unconscious.

Had a great weekend! Many many thanks to those who turned up on Saturday. Will be putting up the photos pretty soon...once I get down to quit procrastinating. Heh.

Well well...should I or should I not?

Wonderful wonderful evening and night. Thank you darling baby.

*phew* It's fine. Wonder whether I should hit the "republish blog" button. Anyway, something really wu liao. Read in the papers today that the scientists have found a way to remove the compounds in beans that causes flatulence. Good news, no?

*yawn* A long day to go. Maybe I'll go back to sleep.

Please, please, pleeeeeease let this entry be OK. Don't want to go through the same episode of missing blogs again.

Um well, nothing much. Charlie's Angels was a good entertaining show. And yesssss...lots of asses to ogle and laugh at (the oh-so-cornee jokes). Heh. Anyway, I think Lucy Liu could do with a bit more dialogue.

Currently, I hope...
1. To drive around town, unchaperoned! Isn't it crazy to worry that I'll hit something when I try to drive so carefully that there's alomost always no cars behind me? (Coz all other cars have overtaken me!)
2. To have infinite time in my hands. Reasons? Well, pretty obvious ones.
3. To have a wonderful massage.

Well, interesting things happen when one is out of the house. Haha. For more information, please go to his blog. I'm just too lazy.

I can't sleep. Urgh.
*
Had an absolutely wonderful suprise today. :)
*
Why isn't anybody online??
*
Reading people's blog is interesting.
*
Beans make people fart.
*
Going online isn't a good way to make me sleepy.
*
I want a good massage...
*
Babies are soooooo cute!!
*
I think I should move my butt and go sleep.

Oh yes! I want to catch Charlie's Angels too. I love Lucy Liu!! And Cameron Diaz's butt!

And to add salt to the wound, what's with this obssesive use of acronyms?? How am I supposed to know what PA stands for? Or CACS for that matter? USC?FIC??

*&^%%$#

Have anyone read What Katy Did? I liked that book very much when I first read it in my lower secondary years. Unfortunately, I can't remember anything in the book. Except for the last part where she fell off the swing and I actually felt so sorry for her that I cried. I like books like these. Books that make me go emotional. That means, the author is good lah.

Currently reading:
The Summons, John Grisham

And oh, what's that NUS Union Camp? Why wasn't I informed about it? So is this a scheme to discriminate people on purpose? And what faculty is Pharmacy under???

I am very bad today. I did something bad. Despicable, disgusting me.

Had an early birthday celebration yesterday at San Francisco Steakhouse. The mint sauce is extremely yummy...of course, the lamb chops complement it well. Heh.

1. Is your hair naturally curly, wavy, or straight? Long or short?
Long and straight with layered ends.

2. How has your hair changed over your lifetime?
Not much. It's either long or short. The longest was halfway down my upper arm. And the shortest, boyish haircut lah. Most of my hair styles (if you could even call them styles) in my early years depend pretty much on functions...like when the ballet exam is near, I'll have long hair. Other wise it's just sleek chin-length...and nerdy looking too.

3. How do your normally wear your hair?
Now that I'm bumming, it's always up in a pseudo bun with a clip. It's pretty hot around this region eh. Otherwise it's either a simple ponytail or nothing at all.

4. If you could change your hair this minute, what would it look like?
Oooooh...I want a body perm. But that will mean longer hair first. Maybe a bit of highlights.

5. Ever had a hair disaster? What happened?
Yes. I think last year's prom hairdo was really baaaaaaad. And the bloody hairdresser made me pay so much for it. Sheesh.

It's 11.15am on the computer clock and I'm still feeling woozy. And I'm just too lazy to get myself to move away from the computer though I know I have some laundry to do, some clothes to iron etc etc. So how. Now, I've got the news that there won't be dryers in uni hostel?? How can that be?? They are the most essential gadget in an independent person's life. *ahem*

Hm. Anyway, I have got this new top with very stringey back and almost halter-neck-like. But stupid me decided to try it yesterday and risked getting a lecture from mom. [*This para may not be significant to most people, but it's OK!]

Why oh why is there so many bruises on myself...

Btw, why do peple call themselves angels? I don't understand. Must they give themselves a better term to make themselves feel more superior towards others? Hmm. What's wrong with being mere mortals? At least we can make mistakes. Hah.

I'm feeling extremely lazy today. So,

Sunway Lagoon, the dry park, Flying Carpet ride, heart-stopping experience, other milder rides, beef noodles, lots of water rides, Sunway Pyramid, Genki Sushi, Anger Management, Kenny Roger's, Caramel Frappucino, ice skating, home.

Long and tiring day, but extremely extremely enjoyable. Wish time would stop. Haha.

And oh, to you, THANK YOU. *muackssssss*

Finally did something more useful today. Went for volunteering work at a free clinic (meaning, a charity one lah) with LY. It was a good experience for me, since I'm going to NUS Pharmacy. So I got to be an interpreter of maladies for one old lady with diabetes and watch how a suppository work! Otherwise, it's just the normal registering for patients, calling them for the doctor, refilling medicines and so on. But I get to learn about the different groups of drugs and a bit of their actions. The nurse was so excited in getting us to know more about the things there. Haha. It was good. I want to go back there again. :)

And one good news! I received the ASEAN Undergraduate scholarship! Now my parents wouldn't have to fork out so much of their money. I just hope I'll be able to complete the bond in Malaysia though. Hmmm.

And one bad news! I sprained my knee again. Don't ask me how. It happened under the most unusual of all circumstances. Think cracking your knuckles. That is how it happened.

I want to slow dance with you,
To the jazzy, sultry croon
To be lost in the world of you.

Moving, swaying.

Let your arms embrace me
Surrounding me
Protecting me

Ah, the beauty of slow dancing.

Heh.

I'm thinking of something to blog about. But I don't want to plague this blog with complaints. Hmmm. Just a thank-you note then.

Hey WL, it's been great going out with you recently and spending so much of our time together. Thanks for all the time when you sorted me out regarding him. *grin* A heartfelt thanks to you for bringing us together. :)

You, Chel, for being the one knocking my head and getting me back to earth. Things can't be so bad all the time eh. All the best to you girl!

Valerie, you have been my spiritual parent for as long as I can remember. Thank God for you. :)

LY, my darling baby, you have been so wonderful and wonderful and wonderful. (Shall not go into specifics here. Heh. Might gross others out.) THANK YOU!

And to the others which I did not mention here, thank you for your presence in my life. You'd have definitely made a difference in my life. :) [*Nad, Johnson, Vince, James the Sibu one, SL etc]

[edit]: Thank you Johnson for thinking that I'm an innocent girl...haha. But I do hope you've learnt that looks ARE deceiving. *grin*

I'm trying to get excited about NUS and Singapore. But it's horrid not to have my darling baby with me...:( Nah, shall not mope about it. Won't make things any better eh.

Uh oh, just received a pleasant/unpleasant news. Sigh.

Thank you Friday Five!

1. What's one thing you've always wanted to do, but never have?
Redecorate my room.

2. When someone asks your opinion about a new haircut/outfit/etc, are you always honest?
More or less honest. But of course, there's always the wonder of words to 'beautify' the situation in nice wrappers. SO, that doesn't count as not-honest, is it?

3. Have you ever found out something about a friend and then wished you hadn't? What happened?
Found out a friend had the same crush as me!! And of course, things weren't the same anymore. Probably due to me coz I'm easily jealous.

4. If you could live in any fictional world (from a book/movie/game/etc.) which would it be and why?
Nottinghill...I wish I'm a guy so that I could be Will. How often do you have mega star falling for you?? And have her risking her pride by saying,"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her." ? I wanna be Will I wanna be Will I wanna be Will. On the hindsight, is his name Will?

5. What's one talent/skill you don't have but always wanted?
To express my thoughts completely in words.

Wonderful weather nowadays. It's either nice and sunny or cloudy when I go out and it's raining when I stay at home. Ahhh...

By the way, why doesn't anybody use the comment box anymore? :(

Dream, the third of The Endless, you are in charge
of the Dreaming, all imagination and
creativity, everyone knows your beautiful
realm, but none truly understand it. You are
dark and brooding, creative, and spend a lot of
time by yourself, just thinking. You are almost
as serious as Destiny, but not quite. Everyone
is enchanted by you, but you keep them all at a
distance, even when you shouldn't.


Which Endless are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Uh. Have not read enough of Sandman to realise the significance of this. But nevermind...I like to be thought of as a deep thinker. Heh.

I love the 'first time' feeling. It's happening all over again! *grin*

Hm, been reading this book on incest lately. This sick guy, after raping his daughter when she was 12, decided to turn his granddaughter 20 years later. Sick sick sick. And are you wondering why am I reading sick books all the time? I don't know. They scream for my attention from the bookshelves. So what can I say.

Had an incredible day! Bowled for the first time in my life and I must say this, I beat 2 guys in my first game!! Nyahaha. Am I a genius or am I a genius? Heehee. But of course, I think those are purely beginner's luck...coz they seem to wear off in the subsequent games. Sheesh. Nevermind. One day I'll beat you both, Lip Yoong and Wee Lee! Just don't ever forget me when you guys go off to US.

Ahhh...think I need a new diary soon. Dumdeedum.

Oh, just being estatic. Heehee.

I'm worth exactly: $1,726,394.00. Cheap ar? Anyway, that's so crappy. I'm priceless OK....

Yay!! Blogger is up and working again! *grin*

Just declined all the offers made to me by the UK universities. And replied to NUS to accept their offer. Sometimes it's just awful not having things going my way...but it's OK. I can accept anything that's thrown to me now. It's OK to be in the shit hole.

It's impossible to post anything recently. Wonder what happened to Blogger. Anyway, I guess I owe everyone a short story on the Asean Reunion, no? Ah, nevermind lah. Who's really interested anyway. So we (the usual threesome) went for The Big Durian yesterday. The film was shown in conjunction with the pseudo KL Arts Festival with very limited genre ie, theatre and film only. And it's a breakthrough because well, it has been shown to students in public universities! Shall not be too obvious here, but one can guess what the implications are. Dumdeedum...

Yay...the old version is back. Just hope it doesn't turn it's back on me anymore.

So, I've got Pharmacy at NUS. How wonderful. I'm absolutely looking forward to the beautiful campus is Singapore.

OK. I stole these. Do ponder on them.

It's ok to kiss a fool
It's ok to let a fool kiss you
But never ever let a kiss fool you

It is better to meet a person who will truly love you later
Than meet someone now who promises to love you but sooner or later leave you forever

It's still best to wait for the one you want
Than to settle for the one available
Best to wait for the one you love
Than to settle for the one who's around
Best to wait for the right one
Life's too short to waste on the wrong person

The gathering was an excellent idea! I'm so glad the relatively new High Comissioner proposed this idea. Maybe there is hope to Malaysia-Singapore relation eh. Hehe. More on the event later. Am very sleepy. :)

A detailed review of 7 TEN.
~Many thanks to Antares of www.kakiseni.com.

Leow Puay Tin’s Dinner For Two In The Best Of Restaurants was a scathing commentary on the death of marriage as an institution, performed in a surreal, semi-operatic style by Anne James and Lim How Ngean. Though no attempt was made at realistic acting, the tragicomic undercurrent of the dialogue was stark and vivid. Leow’s cynical view of the hollowness and sterility of the marital morass may offer cold comfort to couples undergoing similar torment, but the subject has been addressed since the early 1960s by playwrights like Edward Albee (Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?). Yet, year after year, people continue to plunge headlong into the same old dilemma. I suppose, the psychological pitfalls of institutionalized monogamy - and the emotional catatonia it invariably induces – will always be fair game for playwrights.

Not In by Alfian Sa’at – enfant terrible of Singapore’s literary and theatre scene – was an impassioned attempt at pamphleteering against the intimidating powers of a fascist state (defined as a condition wherein business and government conspire to usurp the constitutional rights of individual citizens). Though animatedly enacted by Jerrica Lai (as a “kiasi” political science graduate working in a T-shirt boutique who refuses to fulfil her customer’s order for fear of political repercussions) and Melissa Saila (as an undergrad trying to express her political views by printing anti-war slogans on her T-shirt), the skit came across as something you might see at a consciousness-raising event organised by human rights activists. In other words, the message was laudable but the text a bit too literal, in-your-face, and one-dimensional. Nevertheless, it was reassuring to hear Alfian’s dissenting voice in the face of Singapore’s economically expedient pro-Bushwar stance in recent months.

Anne James and Sumitra Selvaraj did an impressive job of bringing to life Charlene Rajendran’s predictable exposé of the long-suffering Indian woman’s lot in a conservative patriarchal culture. Polishing rehashed some of K.S. Maniam’s pet themes in his short stories and plays about the Indian community. Two upper-class women from two different generations come to terms with their repressed feelings while waiting for guests to arrive at a social event. A row of servants hard at work polishing the silver provided some foreground dynamics and dramatized the title of the play - while the women dialogued, their inner anguish bleeding through their well-groomed façades. No doubt the issues addressed by Charlene’s tame but well-crafted playlet continue to hold currency for a great many women trapped in the Kali yuga – but for me the subject matter and style seems passé in the new millennium. Surely it’s time to move from chest-beating victim consciousness to more adventurous literary ground?

The evening began to really take off with They Will Be Grateful - Huzir Sulaiman’s excruciatingly funny skewering of Malaysia’s brave new corporate-entrepreneurial ethos as the nation eagerly embraces its NIC (Newly Industrializing Country) status. Huzir’s clipped, sloganistic lines were delivered as a comic fugal counterpoint – like a barbershop quartet performing a tuneless opera co-written by Bertolt Brecht and Franz Kafka. Hearty applause goes out to Ghafir Akbar, Jerrica Lai, Lennard Gui, and Lim How Ngean for an impeccably timed and riveting ensemble performance. The synopsis for this gem of a playlet was probably lifted verbatim from an institutional ad for Malaysia Inc or a Cyberjaya corporate prospectus.

Malam Konsert by Jit Murad featured Melissa Saila and Zahim Albakri in a poignant scene from a contemporary suburban made-for-TV domestic drama. A divorced daddy arrives to pick up his kid for the weekend and, while helpng mummy pack the little tyke’s satchel, the estranged couple discharge some residual tension over an unplanned bout of post-marital sex that resulted from watching their kid perform at a recent school concert. Considering the epidemic of divorces we hear about these days, Jit’s masterful and subtle study of a complex issue was charged with therapeutic value: it’s true, just being good friends is far healthier than being unhappily married if parents are truly committed to their children’s emotional stability. The dialogue, as was the naturalistic acting, was entirely credible and hit the spot. Zahim Albakri was a pleasure to watch and Melissa Saila certainly has the potential to blossom into a bi-lingual Meryl Streep.

Mark Teh’s Daulat was a kinetic essay on the schizoid dichotomy within the national psyche - the perpetual conflict between biogram and logogram (the biogram being what the body instinctually does; and the logogram being what the mind has been programmed to believe). Jerrica Lai and Lim How Ngean were in excellent athletic form as they alternately boogied, mamboed, and twitched to the irresistible beat of their youthful lifeblood – and mechanically parroted official dogma and paid lip-service to the feudal, hierarchic mindset governing our mundane existence. With the minimum of verbalization, Teh ingeniously took the perennial non-debate between old age and youth to an illogical extreme, graphically dramatizing the absurdity of the contradictions between what “the authorities” say and what they themselves are inclined to do. It was polemical theatre at its slickest and most poker-faced.

Operating Theatre by Jo Kukathas was pretty much Harold Pinter meets Monty Python. Zahim Albakri played the discarnate intelligence of a man who has been arrested by the Special Branch (Malaysia’s own secret police), interrogated and tortured to the point of unconsciousness, and then sent to the hospital where he expires – putting the doctors and nurses in a moral and political quandary. There were powerful echoes of the arsenic poisoning episode involving erstwhile deputy prime minister Anwar Ibrahim (imprisoned for 15 years on dubious charges) which no one now appears to remember. Lennard Gui played the dead detainee to perfection, while Anne James, Ghafir Akbar, Lim How Ngean, and Mardiana Ismail played the medical team as well as the secret police with efficient panache. It was a cogent piece of political theatre, performed with a heady mix of Chaplinesque slapstick and Beckettsian sombreness.

Director Krishen Jit adroitly wove the seven playlets into a continuous flow by making the scene changes part of the entertainment (as he did, though not so successfully, in Manchester United and the Malay Warrior). Various elements of his dramaturgic explorations over the decades could be seen in each of the playlets – the overall effect being that one simply has to acknowledge that the man is totally dedicated to his craft and lives entirely for theatre. Perhaps consummate mastery has thus far eluded him, but it’s far more useful to posterity for a creative flame to shine consistently and steadily over an entire lifetime, than for it to erupt in blinding brilliance, only to sputter out after a series of shortlived climaxes.

Thanks ZL for your encouragement! I have not replied because I still have hope. Call it foolish hope if you want. :)

Anyway, it's frustrating to go towards open doors and get them slamming in my face. So why were they open in the first place? To quote Wee Lee, make me realise how much I'll miss? Well well, anger in the morning isn't a good thing...but it doesn't help that I've had only 3 hours of sleep!! Stupid tea kept me awake till about 3+ am and some lousy neighbour woke me up at 7am. Blergh.

Sorry for complaining. Oh wait. Why am I apologising? This is my blog.

Argh. Still widely awake. Should've ordered something that'll induce sleep just now.

Anyway (still on the plays), they say Malaysians eat our way into National Stupor while the Irish drink their way into National Depression. Haha. (Correct me if I've misquoted)

Just came back from watching 7 Ten. A, no, seven original 10-minute plays by the Five Arts Centre (this is sounding like an advertisement). Anyway, it was great and I must give credit to the Malaysian authorities for being so lenient (for once!). Though I believe the plays did go through numerous censorship before they are actually being staged. Kudos to them for allowing (supposedly) sensitive topics such as racial stuff to be discussed. And the sex scene (fake one lah) and smoking is allowed on stage. Bummer. Anyway, I liked Malam Konsert the most. Don't know why. It has the most ordinary plot, typical scene and background, but I guess it's just so common that it somehow strikes a chord in me. I don't why I identify with the emotions displayed there. Anyway, the synopsis for it goes, "Two people talk, quarrel and then stop." Haha. That particular play makes me wonder how easily humans can just shut out feelings and life goes on as usual. It's a wonder that how our brains work so hard to blot out the pain. Well well, maybe I'm over-analysing things again. Anyway, this other play by Alfian Sa'at, Not In, is something the Singaporeans should watch. The message is jarringly, obviously clear. Haha. "Not In My Name! Have all the parades and campaigns and what-nots, but not in my name. I am not touching the petition lest I get my fingerprints on it and ISD will come after me!" So typical.

And I think Jerrica Lai looks like a bunny. Heehee.

Asean reunion tomorrow! Maybe I can psyche some people there to sponsor me to UK. I want to go to UK very badly! Why can't people sense that? Am I not vocal enough?? I think my parents can actually afford to send me there, but they're thinking whether it's worth spneding so much money on a degree which I can also get in Singapore at a cheaper price. Heeeelloooo...this is not a supermarket! But I guess I'll have to bend to their will anyway; they're the ones paying for my education. And it's funny that I've had virtually free education for the last 12 years!! I must say I really envy those people that can go overseas (except Singapore). Sigh. Maybe I should stop complaining and be grateful for what I have...

RANDOM THOUGHTS

1. KL's night view is magnificently breathtaking.
2. Some girls are really pretty!
3. I wanna get married. Haha.
4. Men with a wedding band look extremely sexy.
5. I have wonderful friends! Thanks...
6. Romantic shows are actually very nice. (Shall stop being so cynical about them)
7. Think I want to read Pride and Prejudice again.

I have more time now! *grin*

Had a very weird dream. Went to attend somebody's funeral and when the thing ended, me and my family plus other cousins and their family and some angmohs (I have no idea who they are!) went back to the room we shared. (Please pardon the horrid and obvious grammatical error) There were coffins lying around, opened! Apparently (and weirdly), there's a prior knowledge that the coffins were there beforehand, but just not opened. So of course we were curious and wondered what happened. Why were there coffins in the room in the first place, I have absolutely no idea. So, we went to investigate. I can literally feel the fear and like all horror flicks, can feel that some unseen beings are lurking around. (Even as I type this, the breeze is gently tingling me and the windchimes [stupid windchimes!] are making endless noise...anyway, I digress) And somehow, this other person appeared and became our guide around the house. Oh, the house we were in is quite big. With stairs running all over and being just plain big. So we were being led in this funny manner, walking all over the place while we (the younger people) are tagging slightly behind. We arrived at this place where we could easily go from one staircase to the other without actually having to go through a couple more...uh, a shortcut lah. Heh. So instead of taking the long way, we (the younger ones) took the shortcut. And immediately, we were being cut off from our parents. So there was a great amount of crying and noise-making lah. And funnily, they cannot turn back and we cannot proceed. So we had to turn back and before doing so, we made promises that we'll definitely come again and look for them again. (Sounds so weird!) And so it passed that we were back at that labyrinth of stairs again and we finally found them, all looking 10 years or more older! It's such a scary dream!! It's like dying together with your parents and then you are being denied 'access' (to whatever that place is). But then, you are back to the same place again many years later and even though it's a horrid experience, you get to see your family again and that's the greatest joy one can have.

*shudder* I don't like that dream at all. Woke up and immediately realised how much I've taken the people around me for granted. Argh. Anyway, I hate to be ridden with guilt. And it seems like no matter what I do, I feel guilty. Sheesh. I have been released from fear and guilt by Christ's death so what are doing around here you spirit of fear and guilt! I am the child of God and nothing can touch me because you are all defeated! Haha...

Is Bruce Almighty showing in Malaysia?? I wanna watch it!